Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
...
This isn't really me. I don't like corporate culture even if I might fit in it. I don't love the idea of this being "what I do". So I need to ensure it isn't. I'm not nuts about the way corporations are organized and run. At any rate, I'm not interested in playing the game.
I'm doing this for the same reason many are - money. There are too many bills to be paid. Too many debts. Too much at stake. Including my dignity & my sanity. I don't know if you're supposed to identify yourself by what your job is. It's only your means of livelihood. Only!
But I know, as a thinking, sentient human being, that there are other things on earth worthier of spending my life doing. And I will do them. For the life of me. I will not lose my faith.
I am afraid of insecurity. And exhausted with poverty. Working this job ensures that I can sustain myself and building a career on this will ensure fiscal independence - freedom - that I can't really guarantee any other way. But I will not fool myself about it. I haven't. And I won't because I really can't.
Life on this planet is great. It's vast, endless and impossibly multiversal. It would be a shame to waste it in this straight and narrow.
That other thing ... it's not duty. The minute I do something there because of some self-righteous sense of duty born out of obligation ... it's all over. Fresh start then. Wrap up...
I'm doing this for the same reason many are - money. There are too many bills to be paid. Too many debts. Too much at stake. Including my dignity & my sanity. I don't know if you're supposed to identify yourself by what your job is. It's only your means of livelihood. Only!
But I know, as a thinking, sentient human being, that there are other things on earth worthier of spending my life doing. And I will do them. For the life of me. I will not lose my faith.
I am afraid of insecurity. And exhausted with poverty. Working this job ensures that I can sustain myself and building a career on this will ensure fiscal independence - freedom - that I can't really guarantee any other way. But I will not fool myself about it. I haven't. And I won't because I really can't.
Life on this planet is great. It's vast, endless and impossibly multiversal. It would be a shame to waste it in this straight and narrow.
That other thing ... it's not duty. The minute I do something there because of some self-righteous sense of duty born out of obligation ... it's all over. Fresh start then. Wrap up...
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Work
Work is more than a paycheck. It's dignity. It's respect. It's whether or not you can look your child in the eye and say "we're going to be alright."
Saturday, August 16, 2008
The day everything gave way
15 Aug 08
12:00 PM
I will work this job with dilgence, discipline and focus. And I will pursue my other goals while at it.
I will never forget where I was.. am.. penniless, stubbornly principled, even with practically nothing. The way I looked at cars... money... credit card swipes... cash... luxuries.
15 Aug 08
2:27 PM
I kept it alive with no money. Now I will have to keep the flame burning with cash in my hand. I underestimated the power of capital in individuals' lives. It's the reason people work jobs. The reason things happen. Money is a big deal... very big and pervasive. Influential in every way big or small. It is important to understand this overwhelming fact. Although money.. is not everything.
16 Aug 08
2:11 PM
Even though you're drunk on happiness now, remember that your life henceforth is a luxury. You can be as oblivious as anybody if you chose to.
There are no excuses anymore.
16 Aug 08
830 PM
Don't set material goals for yourself. Their pursuit will be meaningless and exhausting. If you achieve them, the success will be shallow, shortlived and intensely disappointing.
16 Aug 08
9 PM
The pledge I made at the temple
I will work diligently in my job. I will respect my job and perform to fulfill it. I will be grateful to the intent of the person who has offered me this opportunity.
I will be fortunate like few others in the world. I will have the fortune to provide for myself and more - something few people manage though millions want and dream of doing it.
I will not confine my life to my own well-being and happiness. I will strive to fulfill my larger role in the world - as my conscience knows.
My friends love me and care for me. I will be grateful to them and return this, unrequited and manifold.
But my parents have loved me, cared for me and toiled to their bones to provide for me all my life. I am forever indebted to them and it is my sworn duty to give them happiness, ease their burden and eradicate their misery. My sister deserves nothing but the best and I will help her get it.
I will renew this pledge again and I will fulfill it.
At 24 years of age, I am an able, capable adult. I can get up and do what others ponder but don't know how to act upon. Until I begin doing that, I too will not be closing that gap between ideas and action.
12:00 PM
I will work this job with dilgence, discipline and focus. And I will pursue my other goals while at it.
I will never forget where I was.. am.. penniless, stubbornly principled, even with practically nothing. The way I looked at cars... money... credit card swipes... cash... luxuries.
15 Aug 08
2:27 PM
I kept it alive with no money. Now I will have to keep the flame burning with cash in my hand. I underestimated the power of capital in individuals' lives. It's the reason people work jobs. The reason things happen. Money is a big deal... very big and pervasive. Influential in every way big or small. It is important to understand this overwhelming fact. Although money.. is not everything.
16 Aug 08
2:11 PM
Even though you're drunk on happiness now, remember that your life henceforth is a luxury. You can be as oblivious as anybody if you chose to.
There are no excuses anymore.
16 Aug 08
830 PM
Don't set material goals for yourself. Their pursuit will be meaningless and exhausting. If you achieve them, the success will be shallow, shortlived and intensely disappointing.
16 Aug 08
9 PM
The pledge I made at the temple
I will work diligently in my job. I will respect my job and perform to fulfill it. I will be grateful to the intent of the person who has offered me this opportunity.
I will be fortunate like few others in the world. I will have the fortune to provide for myself and more - something few people manage though millions want and dream of doing it.
I will not confine my life to my own well-being and happiness. I will strive to fulfill my larger role in the world - as my conscience knows.
My friends love me and care for me. I will be grateful to them and return this, unrequited and manifold.
But my parents have loved me, cared for me and toiled to their bones to provide for me all my life. I am forever indebted to them and it is my sworn duty to give them happiness, ease their burden and eradicate their misery. My sister deserves nothing but the best and I will help her get it.
I will renew this pledge again and I will fulfill it.
At 24 years of age, I am an able, capable adult. I can get up and do what others ponder but don't know how to act upon. Until I begin doing that, I too will not be closing that gap between ideas and action.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Irony
that I am on the internet to note this. It occurred to me that -
Too much time spent on the internet at my computer is affecting my ability to think coherently, multilaterally, complexly and with focus.
Too much time spent on the internet at my computer is affecting my ability to think coherently, multilaterally, complexly and with focus.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Self-preservation is vital
Self-preservation is vital - I can't lose things I worked so hard to find and staked so much to defend.
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